What Is EMDR Therapy? Everything You Need to Know Before Getting Started
Table of Contents
What is EMDR therapy?
How Does EMDR Therapy Work?
The Eight Phases of EMDR
What Does EMDR Therapy Feel Like?
What Conditions Can EMDR Treat?
Can EMDR Therapy Be Done Virtually?
Why I Became an EMDR Therapist
Common Myths About EMDR
Healing is Possible
FAQs
You've probably heard about EMDR therapy before.
Maybe a friend recommended it. Maybe your therapist suggested it. Maybe you've seen it on social media or heard someone share how much it changed their life.
But what exactly is EMDR? How does it work? Why do so many people say it's different from traditional talk therapy? And most importantly, could it help you?
These are some of the most common questions I hear as an EMDR therapist, and they're great questions to ask. After all, when you're considering any type of therapy, you deserve to understand what the process looks like and why it works.
EMDR, which stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, is one of the most researched and effective treatments for trauma. Originally developed to treat post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), research has shown that EMDR can also help with anxiety, depression, childhood trauma, attachment wounds, grief, panic, chronic pain, and many other concerns.
In this guide, I'll explain what EMDR therapy is, how it works, what you can expect during treatment, common myths about EMDR, and why it has become one of my favorite ways to help clients heal from trauma and move beyond survival mode.
What Is EMDR Therapy?
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)is an evidence-based psychotherapy that helps people heal from trauma and other distressing life experiences. Originally developed to treat post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), EMDR has now been extensively researched and is recognized by organizations like the World Health Organization (WHO), the American Psychological Association (APA), and the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs as an effective treatment for trauma. Research has also shown EMDR can help with concerns such as anxiety, depression, OCD, chronic pain, addiction, grief, attachment wounds, and other experiences that continue to impact daily life.
One of the ways I like to explain EMDR to clients is that we're often only experiencing symptoms in the present because of things that happened to us in the past.
Maybe today you struggle with anxiety, panic attacks, people pleasing, low self-esteem, difficulty trusting others, or constantly feeling on edge. While those symptoms are happening now, they often have roots in earlier life experiences that your brain and nervous system haven't fully processed.
Sometimes painful experiences don't get stored the way they're supposed to.
Most everyday experiences naturally get processed by our brain and stored as long-term memories. We remember what happened, we learn from it, and our nervous system understands that the event is over.
Traumatic or highly overwhelming experiences can be different.
Whether something happened very early in life, was especially intense, or occurred repeatedly over time, those memories can sometimes become "stuck." Instead of feeling like something that happened in the past, your brain and nervous system may continue responding as though the danger is still happening or could happen again.
This is often why people experience symptoms like hypervigilance, emotional reactivity, anxiety, panic, or feeling stuck in survival mode long after the original event has ended.
EMDR helps your brain do what it was naturally designed to do: process those unresolved experiences, integrate them into long-term memory, and recognize that the danger is over. As those memories become less emotionally overwhelming, many people notice they feel calmer, safer, less reactive, and more able to respond to the present instead of reacting from the past.
How Does EMDR Therapy Work?
One of the questions I hear most often is, "How does EMDR actually work?"
The short answer is that EMDR helps your brain finish processing experiences that became "stuck."
I like to explain it this way. Imagine your brain has a natural healing system. Just like your body knows how to heal a cut or mend a broken bone, your brain has an incredible ability to process difficult life experiences and store them as long-term memories.
Most of the time, that's exactly what happens.
But sometimes an experience is simply too overwhelming. It may have happened very early in life, been especially traumatic, or occurred repeatedly over time. When that happens, your brain's natural processing system can become disrupted. Instead of recognizing that the event is over, your nervous system continues responding as though the danger is still happening or could happen again.
That's why a present-day situation can trigger emotions that feel much bigger than the situation itself. Your brain isn't just responding to what's happening now. It's also responding to unresolved experiences from the past.
The theory behind EMDR is called the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model. In simple terms, it suggests that our brains naturally know how to heal from difficult experiences. EMDR helps restart that process when trauma has interrupted it.
One of the unique parts of EMDR is the use of bilateral stimulation, which simply means engaging both sides of the brain in a rhythmic, back-and-forth pattern while briefly focusing on aspects of a distressing memory. Bilateral stimulation can be done through guided eye movements, alternating taps, or auditory tones that move from one side to the other.
The story behind EMDR is fascinating. In the late 1980s, psychologist Dr. Francine Shapiro noticed that while she was walking through a park and thinking about a distressing experience, she began feeling less emotionally overwhelmed by it. She became curious about whether the natural back-and-forth movement of her eyes while walking played a role in that shift. That observation eventually led to years of research and the development of EMDR therapy.
Researchers have also explored similarities between bilateral stimulation and Rapid Eye Movement (REM) sleep, the stage of sleep when our eyes naturally move back and forth, and our brains are actively processing information. While scientists continue studying exactly how EMDR works, decades of research consistently show that it is an effective treatment for trauma and many other mental health concerns.
During EMDR, you don't erase your memories or forget what happened. Instead, the emotional intensity surrounding those memories begins to change. Many clients describe feeling as though the memory becomes something they remember rather than something they continue to relive. They often gain new insight, develop greater self-compassion, and experience a sense of relief as their nervous system finally recognizes that the danger is over.
The Eight Phases of EMDR
One of the things I appreciate most about EMDR is that it's a structured, thoughtful process. EMDR isn't about jumping into traumatic memories on day one. Instead, it follows an eight-phase approach that helps ensure you're prepared, supported, and moving at a pace that feels safe for your nervous system.
While every therapist has their own style, here's what you can generally expect throughout the EMDR process.
Phase 1: History Taking
Together, you and your therapist will explore your history and identify the memories, experiences, and current triggers contributing to your symptoms. EMDR is a three-pronged approach, meaning we look at your past experiences, present-day triggers, and how you want to respond differently in the future.
Phase 2: Preparation
Before processing trauma, your therapist will help you build coping skills, grounding techniques, and resources so you feel safe and supported throughout therapy. In my practice, I often begin with this phase before history-taking because I want my clients to feel prepared and to have tools to regulate their emotions from the very beginning.
Phase 3: Assessment
Together, you'll identify a specific memory to target, along with the emotions, body sensations, and beliefs connected to that experience. This creates a clear roadmap for the work ahead.
Phase 4: Desensitization
This is the phase most people think of when they hear "EMDR." Using bilateral stimulation, you'll briefly focus on aspects of the memory while allowing your brain to naturally process whatever comes up.
Phase 5: Installation
As the emotional distress decreases, you'll strengthen a healthier, more adaptive belief about yourself. For example, "I'm not good enough" may gradually become "I am enough."
Phase 6: Body Scan
Trauma isn't only stored in our memories. It can also be stored in our bodies. During this phase, you'll notice any remaining physical tension or discomfort connected to the memory and continue processing until your body feels more at ease.
Phase 7: Closure
Every EMDR session ends with grounding and stabilization. Whether or not processing is complete, your therapist will help you leave the session feeling regulated and equipped with strategies to care for yourself between appointments.
Phase 8: Reevaluation
At the beginning of future sessions, you and your therapist will review your progress, celebrate changes, and decide together whether to continue with the same memory or move on to another target.
Healing isn't about racing through the eight phases. Some people move through them more quickly, while others spend more time building safety and resources before beginning trauma reprocessing. The goal isn't to move fast. The goal is to help you heal safely and effectively.
What Does EMDR Therapy Feel Like?
One of the biggest questions people ask before starting EMDR is, "What is it actually going to feel like?"
The honest answer is that it's different for everyone.
EMDR is designed to activate the memory you're working on so your brain can process it. That means it's normal to experience emotions, thoughts, body sensations, or other memories coming to mind during a session. Depending on the memory you're processing, you might notice sadness, anger, fear, relief, or even moments of unexpected insight. Some people cry, while others notice physical sensations like tightness in their chest, tension in their shoulders, or changes in their breathing.
While EMDR can feel emotionally activating, it should not feel overwhelming or retraumatizing. A trained EMDR therapist will continuously monitor how you're doing and work to keep you within your window of tolerance, a level of activation where you're engaged in the work without becoming flooded or shutting down. If you begin feeling overwhelmed, your therapist will pause, help you regulate, and use grounding or resourcing techniques until you feel ready to continue.
Another common misconception is that you'll spend the entire session talking about your trauma.
In reality, there are often periods where you aren't talking at all.
After identifying the memory you'll be working on, your therapist will guide you through bilateral stimulation while you simply notice what comes up. You might notice thoughts, emotions, body sensations, images, or memories. Every minute or so, your therapist will briefly check in, ask what you noticed, and then continue the process. You never have to describe every detail of what happened if you don't want to. Many clients appreciate that EMDR allows them to heal without repeatedly retelling their story.
Most importantly, you're in control throughout the entire process.
In my practice, I remind clients that they can pause at any time. Whether that's using a stop word, raising a hand, or simply telling me they need a break, we stop. Trauma-informed therapy is collaborative, and your pace matters. My role is to guide and support you, never to push you beyond what feels safe.
The goal of EMDR isn't to overwhelm your nervous system. It's to help your brain process painful experiences in a way that feels manageable, safe, and ultimately healing.
What Conditions Can EMDR Therapy Treat?
While EMDR was originally developed to treat post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), decades of research have shown that it can be effective for many other concerns rooted in distressing or overwhelming life experiences. Because EMDR focuses on processing the experiences that contribute to present-day symptoms, it can help people heal from a wide range of emotional and psychological challenges.
Here are just a few of the concerns EMDR may help treat:
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): EMDR is one of the most researched and effective treatments for PTSD, helping people process traumatic memories so they no longer feel as emotionally or physically overwhelming.
Childhood Trauma: Early life experiences can shape the way we think, feel, and relate to others. EMDR can help process childhood memories that continue to impact self-esteem, relationships, and emotional well-being.
Anxiety: For many people, anxiety develops after experiences where they didn't feel safe. EMDR can help address those underlying experiences so the nervous system no longer responds as though danger is still present.
Panic Attacks: By processing the experiences connected to fear and danger, EMDR can help reduce the intensity and frequency of panic symptoms.
Grief and Loss: EMDR can help people process painful losses, allowing space for healing while honoring the relationship and memories that remain.
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD): EMDR may be used alongside other evidence-based treatments to address distressing experiences that contribute to obsessive thoughts or compulsive behaviors.
Depression: When depression is connected to unresolved trauma, loss, or negative beliefs about oneself, EMDR can help process those experiences and support emotional healing.
Medical Trauma: Difficult medical procedures, chronic illness, accidents, or frightening healthcare experiences can leave lasting emotional effects. EMDR can help reduce the distress associated with those memories.
Performance Anxiety: Whether it's public speaking, athletics, testing, or professional performance, EMDR can help process experiences that contribute to fear, self-doubt, or performance blocks.
Attachment Wounds and Relationship Trauma: Experiences of emotional neglect, abandonment, betrayal, inconsistent caregiving, or unhealthy relationships can shape how we connect with others. EMDR can help heal these attachment wounds, making it easier to build healthier, more secure relationships.
While EMDR is an incredibly versatile therapy, not every concern is rooted in trauma. A qualified EMDR therapist can help determine whether EMDR is the right approach for your unique goals and experiences.
Can EMDR Therapy Be Done Virtually?
Yes. Research supports the effectiveness of virtual EMDR therapy, and I provide EMDR exclusively through secure telehealth sessions with adults throughout Nevada.
Many people are surprised to learn that EMDR can be just as effective virtually as it is in person. During online sessions, we simply adapt the bilateral stimulation to fit a telehealth setting. Depending on your preferences and what works best for you, this may include self-tapping, alternating auditory tones, or guided eye movements using a secure online platform.
One of the benefits of virtual EMDR is that you get to participate from the comfort of your own home. For many people, this can create an added sense of safety and familiarity. After an emotionally activating session, you're already in your own space where you can rest, journal, practice your grounding skills, or simply give yourself time to decompress.
Just like in-person EMDR, your safety remains my top priority. Before beginning trauma reprocessing, we'll spend time building grounding skills, strengthening your internal resources, and making sure you feel prepared for the work ahead. Throughout every session, I'll help you stay within your window of tolerance, ensuring the process feels manageable, collaborative, and supportive.
Whether EMDR is provided virtually or in person, the goal remains the same: to help your brain process unresolved experiences so your nervous system can recognize that the danger is over and you can move beyond survival toward greater healing, peace, and connection.
Why I Became an EMDR Therapist
There are a lot of reasons I fell in love with EMDR, but it started long before I began using it with clients.
During my EMDR basic training, our days were divided between learning the research and actually experiencing the therapy ourselves through practicum. I still remember processing one of my own memories and noticing a shift almost immediately. Even though my partner had only just learned the protocol, I experienced firsthand how powerful EMDR could be. It wasn't just something I was reading about anymore. I felt the difference myself.
That experience sparked my curiosity, but what truly solidified my passion for EMDR was watching it transform the lives of my clients.
Over the years, I've seen people move from feeling overwhelmed by shame and anxiety to experiencing greater self compassion, confidence, and peace. I've watched clients who once felt trapped by the past begin responding to the present with a greater sense of safety and resilience. Seeing those moments of healing unfold in the therapy room has only deepened my belief in this work.
Because of that, I chose to pursue EMDR certification beyond my basic training. I believe my clients deserve a therapist who is committed to lifelong learning, ongoing consultation, and providing the highest quality trauma-informed care possible. My goal isn't simply to use EMDR. It's to continue growing in my knowledge and skills so I can better support every person who trusts me with their story.
For me, EMDR is more than a therapy technique. It's one of the most meaningful tools I've found to help people move beyond survival, reconnect with themselves, and create lasting healing.
Common Myths About EMDR Therapy
There's a lot of misinformation about EMDR, which can understandably make people feel nervous about trying it. Here are a few of the most common myths I hear and the truth behind them.
-
Reality: You remain in control the entire time. EMDR is a collaborative, trauma informed therapy. You can pause, take a break, or stop the session at any point. In my practice, I encourage clients to use a stop word or simply raise their hand if they need to pause. We always move at your pace.
-
Reality: You don't have to share every detail for EMDR to be effective. Many people appreciate that EMDR doesn't require repeatedly retelling their story. Your therapist only needs enough information to guide the process safely.
-
Reality: EMDR is not hypnosis. You remain fully awake, aware, and present throughout the session. You're simply focusing on a memory while your therapist guides you through bilateral stimulation.
-
Reality: EMDR doesn't erase your memories. Instead, it changes the way those memories are stored and experienced. Most people still remember what happened, but the memory no longer carries the same emotional intensity or feels like it's happening in the present.
-
Reality: EMDR is not designed to recover hidden or repressed memories. Sometimes clients naturally remember details they haven't thought about in years because they're processing related experiences, but the goal of EMDR is not to uncover forgotten memories. The focus is on helping you heal from the experiences and symptoms you're experiencing today.
Healing is Possible
If there's one thing I hope you take away from this article, it's this: healing is possible.
Trauma has a powerful impact on the brain and nervous system, but it doesn't have to define the rest of your life. Whether you're struggling with childhood trauma, anxiety, panic, relationship wounds, or simply feeling stuck in survival mode, EMDR offers an evidence-based path toward healing.
Like any therapy, EMDR isn't about erasing your memories or pretending painful things never happened. It's about helping your brain process those experiences so they no longer have the same hold on your thoughts, emotions, body, and relationships.
If you're considering EMDR therapy, I encourage you to ask questions, find a therapist you trust, and move at a pace that feels right for you. Healing isn't about rushing. It's about creating enough safety for your brain and nervous system to finally recognize that the danger is over.
If you're looking for an EMDRIA Certified EMDR therapist in Nevada, I'd be honored to support you on your healing journey. You can learn more about my approach or schedule a free consultation to see if we're a good fit.
Ready to learn whether EMDR therapy is right for you? Schedule your free consultation today.
FAQ
-
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is an evidence based psychotherapy that helps people process and heal from trauma and other distressing life experiences. It uses bilateral stimulation to help the brain reprocess memories so they no longer feel as emotionally overwhelming.
-
EMDR helps the brain process experiences that became "stuck." Through the eight phase EMDR protocol and bilateral stimulation, the brain can integrate traumatic memories into long term memory, allowing your nervous system to recognize that the danger is over.
-
There isn't a one size fits all timeline. Every person brings their own history, goals, and experiences into therapy. Some people notice meaningful changes within a few sessions, while others benefit from longer term work. Your therapist will regularly assess your progress and tailor treatment to your individual needs.
-
Yes. Research supports the effectiveness of virtual EMDR therapy for many people. Bilateral stimulation can be adapted for telehealth using techniques like the Butterfly Hug, self tapping, guided eye movements, or alternating auditory tones, allowing many clients to experience the benefits of EMDR from the comfort of home.
-
No. EMDR is not hypnosis. During EMDR, you remain awake, aware, and in control throughout the entire session. You can pause or stop the process at any time, and your therapist will guide you at a pace that feels safe and manageable.
-
No. One of the things many people appreciate about EMDR is that you don't have to describe every detail of what happened for the therapy to be effective. Your therapist only needs enough information to safely guide the process.
-
It's common to experience temporary emotional activation as your brain processes difficult memories, which is why preparation and pacing are so important. A trained EMDR therapist will help you build grounding and coping skills before trauma reprocessing begins and will work to keep you within your window of tolerance throughout treatment. If you become overwhelmed, the process can always be paused and adjusted to meet your needs.
-
EMDR can be helpful for many people experiencing trauma, anxiety, panic, grief, attachment wounds, low self esteem, and other concerns connected to distressing life experiences. The best way to determine whether EMDR is right for you is to consult with a trained EMDR therapist who can understand your goals, answer your questions, and recommend an individualized treatment plan.
